Wednesday, December 21, 2005
.making a fool of myself?.
i am born to make people laugh?
at least to my friends i guess.
somehow, seeing smiles on my friends' faces make me feel wonderful, and i enjoy doing that. All the laughters and so, though i really hate it sometimes because i feel like a clown. hilarious videos of mine, stripteases, and awkward dance moves are some of the "achievements" i have made so far - they never fail to make people laugh. in fact, i know the "audience" enjoy seeing it, BUT, the funny thing is... i don't. If you ask me to see myself, i wouldnt be able to do so. i will be grossed out actually. thats why i never have videos of myself committing such acts in my collections. weird, but i don't know why.
how funny. i gave up trying to be serious in front of my friends. i am usually the topic of my friends. they comment anything about me - my hair, my running style, the way i play sports, the way i speak, my pimple outbreaks, my shoes, and etc etc. it has become such a norm that i will feel uneasy if my friends stop talking about me.. does that mean, i am an attention-seeker? Seriously, i feel i have this love-hate relationship with the getting attention thing. No attention? i think i will feel weird. Too much attention. I just can't wait to shun away from it.
BUT, don't get me wrong please. I am actually a perfectionist when it comes to doing projects and so. Don't mess around with me and start boohuhuing. Work means work. I am serious.
I am so often misunderstood. Argh!! Just a random thought. ha.
Tuesday 20.12.05
just well-spent. got tricked into going R's house to prepare food for SM*X Xmas Party. argh argh argh. i was so bored initially as i had no mood for socialising. turned out fine actually, because i ended up knowing some people better. saw R and his dad and i think quite heartwarming as R seems really close with his dad. was telling S ultimately the most successful parents are those who get filial kids, rather than just wealth but an incomplete family.
the party turned out fine as well. so many people. was weird initially as there were many unfamiliar faces. couldn't show off my crazy side :P not on socialising mode. caught up with some of my friends before going to J's house to help out with the deco of his christmas tree with S.
the christmas tree is really nicely done up. ( S did most of the job la. ) haha. must show pics when i get them from J man. i performed another stupid dance thing for S and J. haha. and... we took many artistic pics with the xmas tree as well. very professional looking shots :)
monday 19.12.05
went for L's chalet! thank you for organising this man, though attendance quite poor due to heavy commitments for the rest. won quite a bit for mahjong. my luck seems good this month man. haha. went home at 2am and was damn shagged. was hoping swimming training the next morning will be cancelled, and it really did! *phew* never felt so relieved before. ha. and... YH is really cute man. if only i have a baby brother like him. haha.. and he acts like me. damn funny.
Jon, where are the photos we took anyway?
floated away at
2:48 AM